The Noninocent ShiningForceII
by shinfan
Summary: Yep! Whoever have played with the game know how inocent it is. It's for children anyway. Well, this is the original story, before censorship came.
1. Chapter 1

Author note: Well, I'm sorry if this offends anyone. I just thought it was funny (it was fun to write) I can't say it's completely original because some of the dialoges I got them from a forum of the game. I hope they don't get angry because I did this. I will ask them about it. After all, it's easy to delete a story. I hope you enjoy reading it.

By the way, this game and the characters in it don't belong to me. Neither Batman, Southpark or Naruto characters (they appear once)

Oh! and I used a bit too much the word "bitch". I hope it's fine rating it as "T"

* * *

A boy enters Granseal's school. 

Elf girl: What's up, Bowie?

Bowie: Morning, Sarah! Hi, Chester!

But the centaur is asleep.

Sarah: Sir astral's not here yet. And Jaha hasn't arrived yet.

Astral appears.

Astral: Where is Jaha? Late? I'm gonna spank him soooo much….

Soldier enters: Sir Astral! You must come to the castle.

Astral: So they need more of my porn magazines…

Soldier: Cut the crap! The king is ill!

Sarah and Bowie: **o.O**

Chester: Zzzz…

Astral: Bitches, I'm going to the castle. Stay here.

He goes away

Bowie: Day off! Free time!

Sarah: We should follow him.

Bowie: Why? **¬**.**¬**

Sarah: Because the story is like this, you moron! Besides I want to see the castle.

Bowie: I don't care.

Sarah: Please…:3

Bowie: No way.

Sarah: Don't make me bitch-slap you!

Bowie: Lets go! nn

Sarah: Wake up, e-mule-thing!

Chester: ZzzEu? I wasn't sleeping!

Bowie: Suuure…

* * *

They arrived to the castle's door 

Guard: Why are you here?

Sarah pisses herself.

Sarah: They made me come! **ToT**

Bowie kicks her.

Bowie: We have come to see the king. We're strippers.

Sarah: **O.o**

Chester: **O.O**

Guard: Ok, go ahead. But later come here to a personal lap dance.

Bowie: S-sure.

They enter. Sarah bitch-slaps Bowie.

* * *

P.Elis: Is my father going to die? 

Astral: Don't think so.

P.Elis: Aw… I wanted to be the queen…

* * *

Astral watch Bowie, Sarah & Chester. **O.O** He glares at them. 

Bowie: No! He's glaring at us!

Sarah: With his glare Nº4!

Chester: I'm burning!

Astral: You disobeyed me! Die, bitches!

Minister: You can't kill the main bitches, Sir Astral!

Astral: Fine! But you're coming with me to the tower. I'll spank you later.

Minister: And what about the king?

Astral: I can spank him too.

Minister: No! I mean his illness!

Astral: He could die for what I care… I mean, he needs an exorcism. I'm going to find a devil to posses him.

Minister: **o.O** WTF?

* * *

In the tower, they see a devil. 

Astral: Perfect! That gizmo could posses the king.

Gizmo: Do not want! Roar!

Astral: Bowie, defeat him!

Bowie: WTH?

Sarah pisses herself… again.

Chester: You start to stink, bitch.

Sarah bitch-slap Chester.

Chester shits himself (he's half horse after all…)

Gizmo: This is too nasty! I surrender!

Everyone: Yay!

* * *

The gizmo possesses the king. Sir Astral unpossessed him. Astral is ill. 

Sarah: What can we do to help Sir Astral?

Minister: You should go to Yeel to get captured… I mean, to contact Hawel about the tower.

Bowie: Thank you Sarah **¬.¬**

Sarah: **9,9**

Chester: Zzzz…

At the main door they find Jaha the dwarf (Mini-me)

Bowie: We're going to Yeel, You coming, Smurf?

Jaha: Sure thing! And call me Smurf again and I'll shove this axe through your…

Bowie: Upsie!

Sarah: Let's go, Bitches!

* * *

In Yeel… 

Sarah: We're lost!

Chester: That shortcut through Prompt was not good.

Bowie: Can you help, Spiky-hair?

Kazin: I'm Kazin, the Emo-Mage servant of Hawel.

Chester: Do you have cookies?

Kazin: At home, Wanna come?

Everyone: Yay, cookies!

* * *

They found Hawel injured 

Kazin: Master! You're dieing!

Hawel: Shut up, slave! I'm just bleeding from the butt. Those galam soldiers…

Kazin: My master is dieing! **TT********TT**

Hawel: I'm alive!

Kazin: I don't want you to die! **TT********TT**

Hawel: Helloooo!

Kazin: Don't die, Master! **TT********TT**

Sarah bitch-slaps him.

Bowie: Why did galam soldiers came?

Hawel: They stole my porn!

Kazin: What will I do without a master? Who will spank me?

Sarah: I'll do! **n.n**

Hawel: That porn is something the ancients led me. There is more in the tower of Granseal. Bitch, Recover my porn! Ò.Ó

Kazin: Eeeek! Hawel have come from the dead. He's a stinky zombie!

Hawel: No, the elf-bitch is the one who stinks.

Chester: You haven't changed your panties yet, don't you?

Sarah: Which panties?

Kazin: Die, you zombie! BLAZE!!!

Hawel dies.

Kazin: I'll avenge my master! (and recover his porn) **TT********TT**

Bowie: You're really fucked up, emo-dude.

Kazin: Bitch-boss, I'm joining your Bitch Force.

Bowie: Ok… U.U

* * *

They found Galam soldiers and his Captain, Lemon. 

Kazin: You killed Hawel!

Kail: You Bastards!

Sarah bitch-slaps Kail. He goes back to Southpark, Colorado.

Bowie: Return the porn, Yaoi!

Lemon: I'm Lemon not Yaoi, jerk! And about the porn issue…No way!

FIGHT!

LOSE!

JAIL!

* * *

In galam jail. 

Minister: Wake up, bitch!

Chester: I was not asleep!

Minister: Shut up, bitch. I was referring to your Bitch-boss.

Bowie: What's up baldie?

Minister: War!

Everyone: WTF?

Minister: King Galam suddenly wants the porn in Ancient Tower.

Sarah: Hey, Micky mouse! Get us out from here.

Rat: No. You'll bitch-slap me when you discover I'm the starter of all this.

Everyone: How?

Rat: I stole Galam porn and the two jewels protecting the Ground Seal. I'm Slade.

Chester: …Don't touch our jewels, bitch!

Slade: Aw…

* * *

He let them free. They escape but soldiers found them. 

Sold1: Those bitches escaped!

Sold2: Spank them!

FIGHT!

WIN!

While Sarah heals Chester and Kazin, Bowie and Slade took the Jewel of Light. It fuses to Bowie's neck.

Everyone: WTH?

Bowie: Now I have three jewels!

Sarah bitch-slaps him.

* * *

They went back to Granseal's Castle. 

King: Galam is with Elis!

Lemon: Wait till he rapes her!

Astral: If we wait he will steal our porn. Lets go!

Everyone go with them.

* * *

Devil-Batman bites Lemon. He apparently dies. 

Sarah bitch-slaps Batman. He returns to Gotham.

The rest go to the tower. The three and the force found Galam and Elis.

K.Galam: Bye, bitches! I'm going to a dimension were the evil gathers and there is tons of tentacle porn.

Chester: OMG! Tentacle porn!

Sarah bitch-slaps Chester.

K.Galam and Elis began to levitate to a black huge hole which nobody have noticed till now. **¬.¬**

Astral: Bowie, you're good at performing acrobatics!

Bowie: _Is he referring to the fact that I can suck my…_

Astral kicks him to Galam: Save her! She's got my porn!

Bowie hold himself with Elis dress and Galam Jewel of Evil.

K.Galam: Bitch! Don't touch my Jewels!

P.Elis: Oro?

Bowie falls with half the dress and the Jewel. (It fuses to his neck too)

P.Elis: Eeeek!!!

K.Galam. No! Without the Jewell I can't see in the darkness. How will I read the porn now? Damn you Bitch!

They disappear in the hole.

K.Granseal: My whore-daughter is gone. Who will spank me now?

Minister: I'll do! n.n

Everything trembles.

Everyone: Lets get out!

* * *

In their way out they found a little green monster. 

Kiwi: Kiwi-kiwi!

Slade: WTH is that thing?

Kiwi: Kiwi!

Sarah: It's kinda cute!

Chester: I think it's a pokemon.

Bowie: I'll call him Kiwi!

Jaha: Why?

Bowie: Because it's small, round and green.

* * *

Granseal disappears in a chasm and everyone is saved by the ships. They leave Grans Island and go to Parmecia. They found New Granseal and build it in two years. Then it's time to go exploring. An old weird bald bird appears. 

Bird: Who are you, invader bitches?

Minister: We're the habitants of Grans Island.

Bird: Is there where the porn gathers?

Everyone: …

Bird: I mean, where evil gathers? I'm Peter, a phoenix.

Minister: The legendary bitch! I mean bird…

Peter: Legendary? WTF? You're weird people. I'll take some of you with me to offer God Volcanon in sacrifice.

Minister: Fine! Wait a minute… Bitch Force!

Bowie appears.

Minister: Follow this bird to…(Thinks an excuse…) make alliances with other people?

Bowie: OK!

Peter: You got that right, bitch!

* * *

In their way to Ribble village they found devil enemies 

FIGHT!

Peter finish off all the enemies. He only does that. The rest of the force weakened them.

Chester: That fucking bird doesn't let us get exp.!

Everybody Glares at Peter. **¬.¬**

Peter: **9,9**

Sarah: bitch-blast him. He explodes, dies and come back.

Kazin: A stinky zombie! Die! BLAZE! **TT********TT**

Peter dies again. He resurrect again.

Kazin: A zombieX2! This is even more zombie than the other. **TT********TT**

Peter: Excuse me…

Kazin: Die! BLAZE!

Peter dies again. He resurrect again.

Kazin : That's a Concentrated zombie! **TT********TT**

Peter: Wait…

Kazin: Die! BLAZE!

Peter dies AGAIN. He resurrect AGAIN.

Kazin: It's a Ghoul! **TT********TT**

Peter: Emo-bitch, could you stop doing that?!

Kazin: Die! BLA…

Sarah bitch-slaps Kazin.

Peter: Thank you Sarah.

Sarah: My hand hurts…

Slade: You bitch-slap too much, bitch!

Sarah bitch-kicks him in the groin.

Slade: 

Sarah: You're right, bitch! This is much better.

Everyone get a step away from Sarah.

* * *

They arrive to Ribble. 

Hippie Man1: Look! They have weapons! They are evil people!

Hippie Man2: Run away!

B. Force: …**¬.¬**

A female centaur appears. She carries a bazooka.

May: Evil devils, die!

B. Force: Ekkkk!

Peter stops her.

Peter: They are not devils. They are just bitches. You can't kill the main bitches.

May: And you?

Peter: I'm a phoenix!

May: The legendary bird!

Peter: Legendary? What's wrong with you, people?

Bowie: We fight against the Devil army…

May: Why?

Bowie: It's in the script, See?

He lends her a notebook.

May: Here says I join you.

Bowie: Ok!

May: But I don't want to join! I'm fine in here!

Neji Hyuuga appears.

Neji: You can't go against destiny.

Sarah bitch-kick him in the groin. He goes back to Konoha.

Sarah: I like hitting people! I'm going to be a MasterBitch!

B. Force: …

Sarah: I mean, a MasterMonk.

May becomes a Bitch!

I mean… May joins the Bitch Force!

* * *

They travel together a lot. They became friends and by the time they arrive to the Cavern of Darkness, Peter has decided not to sacrifice any of them to Volcanon, except Kazin, who still Blazes him whenever he can. 

They enter the cavern.

Jaha: I can't see!

Chester: It's very dark…

Slade: Well, it's called the cavern of darkness, you know… **¬.¬**

Sarah tries to bitch-kick Slade in the groin but misses.

Slade: Aw…I can't bitch-hit if I can't see!

Everyone else: Yippy!

Peter: I heard this was the house of a hobgoblin.

Hobgoblin: You got that right, bitch!

Sarah: It's the Hobgoblin!

Slade: Where is he?

Chester: Dunno. Where are you?

Jaha: Who are you talking to?

Bowie: Who are you?

May: Who I am?

Kazin: Why am I emo?

Sarah starts bitch-slapping everyone she can

Peter-_Stupid bitches! __**¬.¬**_

Jaha: I found the way out!

B-Force: Where?

Jaha: Dunno, when I came to say this to you I've lost myself again.

Sarah tries to bitch-blast him but misses and hit the Hobgoblin.

Hobgoblin defeated!

They are lost some years. To know about that time… Well, I suppose you can play "Shining in the darkness" or something.

* * *

They eventually go out from the cavern and arrive to Polca village, next to Mount Volcano. 

Peter: My village, Bedoe is in Mt Volcano. We should go there to see God Volcanon.

Then an earthquake sends them to the ground.

Slade: WTF!

Peter: That's Volcanon power. He seems to be angry. It must be your fault, bitches.

B-Force: Why the fuck?

Peter: Because that way he won't spank me.

A blind purple haired boy appears and faints.

Peter: What a wuss!

Bowie: Hey, you! Yeah, the old fat mayor! Take care of him.

Old fat mayor: Why?

Bowie: Do you want her to bitch-slaps you?

Sarah: nn

O-f-Mayor: I'll take care of him!

Sarah: Aw…

* * *

They arrive to Bedoe main door: 

Birdman1: Don't pass through here, bitches!

Birdman2: Let's spank them!

Peter: Excuse me?

B1: Oh! It's Master Peter!

Peter: That's right bitch! I'm going to see Volcanon with them.

B2: But you can only go with one. The other bitches stay here.

Peter: Why?

B1: We've suffered the devil's attack. We're now paranoids.

Peter: Ok! Let's go, Bowie.

* * *

They met King Bedoe. 

K.Bedoe: I see you've returned, Peter.

Peter: Glad you start using glasses: **¬.¬**

K.Bedoe: Volcanon is angry, bitch! What did you do to him?

Peter: Nothing… **9,9**

K.Bedoe: Really?

Peter: Well… maybe I… kind of … stole his porn… by mistake.

K.Bedoe: So you really did something to him? I was just testing you… But I'm glad.

Peter: You are?

K.Bedoe: Sure thing! Now it's you who is gonna be spanked.

Peter: Crap…

* * *

They go to a chapel where a giant statue is. Bowie stares at it. 

Bowie: Mmmm…. I wonder if he's trying to compensate something….

Then, lasers starts to glow in the statue's eyes towards Bowie.

Bowie: Ekkk!

Peter: Volcanon, wait! You can't kill the main bitch!

The lasers begins to turn to Peter.

Peter: By the way, King Bedoe gave me this before I went away. I think they must be yours…

He let on the floor some porn magazines. The glow in the eyes disappears.

Bowie: Lying bitch…

Volcanon: I'm going to leave K. Bedoe's ass like the Japanese flag! Anyway… Peter, who is this bitch?

Peter: This is Bowie from Granseal.

The eyes glow again.

Volcanon: Fucking Granseal Bitch! Die!

Peter: WTF!

Volcanon: Granseal people released Zeon, the devil Bitch. He will spread his bitchingness throughout the entire world.

Peter: And what will you do?

Volcanon: I'm gonna spank this Granseal bitch.

Peter: No! I mean about Zeon!

Volcanon: Nothing. The world has been saved by the Bitch Force many times in the past. You'll do it!

Peter: You're not gonna help us?

Volcanon: I can't say that I will help you because that way the devils will think that I will not help you when fact is that I don't want them to think that I think that they'll think that I'll help them helping you by not helping you at all.

Peter. Ah! That's very clever!

Bowie: WTF?! **0.o**

Volcanon: Bowie! You're the chosen one! Your jewels are no ordinary ones.

Bowie: He,he! I always knew MY jewels were great. Any chick could notice that!

Peter slaps Bowie.

Volcanon: Peter, before you go. Can you tell King Bedoe to come? I have to discuss with him about this magazines…

* * *

Peter: Hey, king! Volcanon called you! 

K. Bedoe: I'm coming! Luke, go to Polca and get a raft ready. They'll go to the west and see if Mitula in Tristan is fine. Dr Rohde will help you in Hassan.

Luke: Sure!

* * *

They exit Bedoe. The others are playing strip poker. 

Sarah: You lose Chester.

Chester: But I have no more clothes left to take off!

Sarah: Then start putting on these.

She lends him slave-clothes.

Bowie: Let's go back to Polca!

Then a pigeon falls over Bowie's head.

Motherbird: You saved my son, skrech!

Jaha: Shrek?

Sarah: Is that a word in your birdmen language?

Slade: No, I think it's something birds usually say. Like "woof" for dogs…

* * *

In Polca they found devils threatening people. 

Devil1: Give us Odd…

The bitch Force interrupted them.

Bowie: Evil bitches, die!

Kazin: Look! Zombies! BLAZE! **TT****TT**

FIGHT!

Jaha: These devils are stronger than the others.

Slade: This Bitch Force needs another bitch.

A beast-man appears and starts destroying devils with great force.

May: What a tank!

WIN!

Peter: Thank you, bitch!

Gerhalt: Fighting alongside you surely will help me controlling my killing instincts. I'm Gerhalt, a beast man.

Gerhalt joins the Bitch Force!

* * *

They go to the house the purple haired boy is. 

Old fat man: Ekkk! Don't kill me! Take my porn, but don't kill me!

Bowie: WTF?

Peter: This bitch is fucked up…

O-f-man: Oh, It's you! Well, thank you for saving us.

Jaha: It was noth…

O-f-man: Now, get the fuck out of here! You and this boy attract devils.

Sarah: Well, I'm so pretty…

Bowie bitch-slap Sarah.

Luke: I've got a raft prepared for us.

Peter: Us?

Luke: Of course. By now King Bedoe will have notice your trick with Zeon's magazines. I'm not going to return now. He'll need somebody to spank and I'm not going to be that somebody.

Bowie: Glad your purpose of joining are so noble… **¬.¬**

Luke joins the Bitch force!

* * *

Bowie: Ok, let's go. Who are you boy? 

Boy: I can't remember. Besides I'm blind. I think my name sound something like Od-ai.

Cheter: Odd-gay? Surely your hair matches your name.

Bowie: You are odd, really… I'll call you Oddler.

Oddler: Ok!

Oddler go with the Bitch Force!

Then he falls due to some stairs.

Bowie: Could you watch where you're going?

Oddler: …You know what blind means?

* * *

They go through the river. 

Chester: There is much left? I can't sleep in here!

Jaha: When do will get there?

Slade: We've been here so long…

Bowie: Shut the fuck up! We'll be there when we get there!

* * *

Just before arriving the raft stopped. 

Slade: What happened?

Bowie: I dunno, Oddler, can you see something special out there?

Oddler: What part of "I'm blind" don't you get?!

Jaha: Look! A tentacle!

The tentacle grabs May arm.

Chester: OMG! Tentacle porn!

Sarah bitch-kicks Chester in the groin.

Peter: It's a kraken! A sea monster!

Jaha: This is more like a river monster…

Sarah bitch-slaps Jaha.

Bowie: Oddler! Beware of that tentacle over there!

Oddler: WTH? Auch!

Bowie: What's wrong with you? Are you blind or something?

Oddler: … And you must be deaf…

Fight!

There is a great fight between May, Sarah and the tentacle monster. The others sit to watch the show.

Cheter: What I said before.

Slade: But they aren't wearing schoolgirls uniform… **ó.ò**

Kazin: We should help them…

Bowie: Let them ten more minutes.

WIN!

* * *

Sarah heals some bleeding noses. After that, she and May bitch-kick them all in the groin. Then they enter Hassan. 

Bowie: Hey! This is my father's village!

Jaha: Really? It's a bit far from Grans…

Bowie: Well, he was the leader of the previous Bitch Force and traveled a lot. He's Max's nephew, who was also a leader of a Bitch Force.

Chester: How do you know that?

Bowie: I'm member of a Shining force web site.

Sarah: Psst! Bitch! Internet doesn't exist yet!

Bowie: Damn! Well… then… An angel called Moogie appeared in a dream explaining this all. Yeah, that's it…

Peter: Bitches, could you cut the crap?! Now we're seeing Dr Rhode, he…

Jaha: Who is he? A tourist agent?

Peter: Nope! He's just another bitch. But he knows how to get to Creed's mansion, he's…

May: Who is he? A possible ally?

Peter: Will you let me finish!!! He's an ex-devil. He'll help us.

Kazin: You're ally of a devil! I knew you were evil! Die! **TT********TT**

Peter: Not again… **¬.¬**

Kazin: BLA…

Sarah bitch-slaps Kazin.

Peter: Thanks, Sarah! Bowie, why the fuck did you let this blaze-bitch to join you?

Bowie: Well, all this kind of group needs an emo-character, so…

Jaha: Can we see Rohde now? U.U

Kiwi: Kiwi, Kiwi!

Chester: nodding Sure!

Slade: Do you understand what he said?

Chester: Of course!

Slade: And?

Chester: He said Kiwi-Kiwi.

Sarah bitch-kicks Chester in the groin.

* * *

They enter Rohde's house. 

Rohde: I'm sorry, I'm busy now. I'm only interested in ancients' objects and time is dear to me. Just go.

Bowie takes out his blade and points it to his throat.

Bowie: You were saying?

Rohde: Um… Hellooooo! I'm so glad to have visitors….What bring you here? Can I offer you some porn and cookies?

Bowie: Mmm… Porn and cookies…

Sarah bitch-slaps Bowie.

Peter: Coward bitch! You said you were only interested in ancients' objects.

Rohde: Well…Umm, that sword is ancient, yeah!

Bowie: Really?

Rohde: Yes! It's the… (Let me invent a name…) Aquilles' sword! It's the only which can beat Taros.

Peter: Taros?

Rohde: The guardian of the caravan. The caravan is a tank that can carry you wherever you want.

Peter: That's interesting. Guide us!

* * *

They go to Taros' shrine in the west. 

Taros: Stop!

Bowie: What the hell is that thing? O.o

Rohde: Didn't I mention that Taros was a giant of more than 40 feet?

Bowie starts kicking him.

Taros: Stop or I'll attack you!

May: What should we do? The caravan is behind him.

Jaha: Maybe if we ask him politely…

Taros: Time's up! Now I'll attack!

Slade: Yeah! You and what army?

Then a bunch of enemies appears.

Slade: Crap!

Luke: You really had to ask, didn't you? **¬.¬**

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

Rohde appears from nowhere. 

Rohde: We did a great job here!

Bowie: We? Where were you, bitch?

They approach the caravan.

Peter: What the…?

Bowie: It's just me or the damn thing is smaller than Kiwi?

Rohde: Well, I had never seen it. Let me have a look…

He approaches to the entrance and disappears. Then the machine starts to move and goes away.

Kazin: He's gone, what are we gonna do now? We'll never be able to reach or destiny, we're doomed! WE… **TT********TT**

Sarah bitch-slaps Kazin.

Bowie: Thanks, Sarah.

Peter: The bitch's gone! He lied to us!

Then the caravan comes back and knocks Peter over.

Rohde: Shut up, fucking bald turkey! I never lie! This machine can carry miniaturised people in it. I'll go with you as a driver!

Rohde carries the Bitch Force!

* * *

Luke: Let's go to Creed's! 

Sarah: Why don't we go back to Hassan to rest a while?

Bowie: Ok!

They were going to enter Hassan when a centaur-boy appears apparently from nowhere.

B-Force: Ekkk!

Slade kicks him: Don't scare us this way, Bitch!

Rick: Sorry! Are you the legendary bitches that kicked the legendary Kraken's ass?

Peter: I guess…

Rick: Oh! You're a legendary Phoenix!

Peter: Why does everyone says…?

Rick: You're legendary heroes who beat legendary evil wherever it is! I can see your journey will be legendary! I'll join you! The justice and peace will be preserved in all this legendary land.

Bowie: Yeah, whatever…

Rick joins the Legendary Bitch Force!

* * *

Thanks to the Caravan, the B-Force is able to arrive to the elven town, where they asked for directions. They found there a vigor ball. 

Sarah: Cool! Here is printed how to become a Master Monk.

Slade: Just what we need… ¬.¬

Sarah tries to cast Dispel on Slade to silence him, but it doesn't work. So she kicks him instead.

* * *

Next to a cave Oddler made them stop. 

Oddler: Wait, I hear something!

Bowie: I don't… Sarah, I told you not to give him so much medical herb! Now he's hallucinating!

Oddler: **¬.¬** … Follow me!

They follow him to a pond where an elven boy is trapped.

E-boy: Help me!

They take him out.

E-boy: Thank you! Those Harpies might have eaten me.

Bowie: What Harpies?

E-boy points behind them: Those!

Harpy1: Our dinner is escaping!

Harpy2: No, he's just bringing us the 2nd dish.

Bowie starts kicking Oddler: Thank you a lot, stupid bitch!

FIGHT!

WIN!

E-boy: Thanks again. I'll repay you guiding you to Creed's mansion. By the way my name is E-boy. I mean, Elric.

* * *

They arrive to Creed's mansion. 

Goliath: Who are you bitches?

Bowie: We're the Bitch Force and want to see Creed.

Goliath: Creed is busy now. Time is dear to him. Now, get the fuck out!

Rohde: This sounds familiar…

Peter: Ok, we're going…

Oddler: No! We should force our entrance!

Bowie: Why do you say "we"?! As if you're going to do something…

Goliath: I can hear you, you know?

Peter: Let's go to the door and then suddenly go back to that door on the left!

Goliath: Do you hear me?

Bowie: Ok! Let's do it!

Goliath: Hellooo?

They tried to do it, but they are caught.

Peter: How did he catch us?

Bowie: Maybe he can read minds…

Goliath: **¬.¬** Ok, bitches! You wanna enter here? Ok, Wish granted!

And he made them small as cockroaches and let them on a desk that seems to them like a soccer field on "Captain Tsubasa" (Aka "Oliver & Benji")

* * *

Jaha: There are people in here! 

Kazin: Mini people like us… **TT********TT**

Rick appears suddenly behind Peter.

Rick: Don't worry justice mates! In the end the justice will prevail!

Peter: Ekk! ... You start to annoy me, you know?

Rick: **:3**

King Pompei: Welcome to Desktop kingdom!

Peter: What a stupid name…

Bowie: We wanna go!

K-Pompei: Aw… But I'm bored. I know! You win me at a chess game and I'll show you the exit.

Peter: Why don't you get a life?

Bowie: Ok… Bitches! Who knows how to play chess?

Rohde: I do!

K. Pompei:3

They follow the king to a giant chess field.

Jaha: What the…?

K. Pompei: Didn't I mention it was a live action chess play?

Peter: What kind of medical herbs have you smoked?

Bowie: Yeah, I want some…

Sarah bitch-slaps Bowie.

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

The King guides them to… the right side of the desk. 

Slade: I thought you were going to show us the way out!

K. Pompei: No! I said I'd show you the exit. How to go out is on your own.

Slade and Jaha start to kick the King.

Kazin: We're trapped in here! We'll never be able to defeat… **TT********TT**

Sarah bitch-slaps Kazin.

Fed up with so much bitch-slapping, Kazin tries to cast Desoul on her but misses (fucking desoul spell!) so he kicks her instead.

May: What shall we do now?

Rohde: We could use the Caravan. It climbs up and goes down like a spider.

Peter: Why you…

Bowie: You knew it all along, didn't you?

Rohde: Sure! But I like to play chess.

Slade and Jaha stop kicking the King and start kicking Rohde with the help of Peter, Bowie, May and Sarah. Then Rick appears in the middle of them and says something like "Justice's waiting for us", scaring all of them. Annoyed, they kick him too.

* * *

Well, at last they left the desktop and find Creed with a fairy. 

Peter: Hello!

Creed: Ew! Cockroaches! Goliath! I've told you to clean better!

He's gonna trample them…

B-Force: Ekkk!!! O.O

Creed: Just joking, LOL.

He makes them big again.

Fairy: Who are you guys?

Bowie: We're the Bitch-Force. Zeon's been released and we have to reseal him again.

Creed: Zeon? OMFG! Follow me!

Only Bowie, Peter, Slade, Oddler and Sarah follow them. May, Rick and Chester can't go downstairs without great difficulty (centaurs…Besides Chester was asleep). The others are looking at the porn in the bookshelves.

* * *

They arrive to a room where an altar is. 

Peter: And now?

Creed: Yeen, queen, tiloora, siloora….

Bowie: Ok, You're creeping me out!

Fairy: He's invoking an evil spirit.

Creed: Kuchiyose no jutsu! (Invoking technique)

Then, a big round ugly face appears.

Sarah: Ekkk!

Slade piss himself.

Ugly Head: What's up Creed?

Creed: Zeon. Tell me about him.

Ugly Head: The place he was sealed is darkened, I can't see a thing. In North Parmecia there is also darkness …

Creed: Maybe Mitula…

Peter: Show him your jewels, Bowie. They are related to Zeon.

Bowie: No way, you perverted freak!

Sarah bitch-slaps Bowie.

Bowie: Oh! You mean the two from my neck?

Peter: ¬.¬

Ugly Evil Spirit Head: Oh yeah! Yeah! I feel it! It's coming, it's coming!

Sarah smacks Evil spirit in the face, but misses. He's just a spirit after all… So she cast blast on him.

UESH: Ouch! Ok, ok! I can sense Zeon. He hasn't revived fully yet. I also sense a whore with him.

Sarah: Could that be Princess Elis? I thought (and hoped) that she was dead…

Peter: But how can we beat Zeon?

Creed: That's easy for him to know. Tell them!

UESH: To defeat Zeon you just have to…

They get interrupted by some members of the Force that are already bored of Creed's old porn.

Kazin: OMG!!! That's an evil spirit! Die! BLAZE! **TT********TT**

He blows up Evil Spirit.

Creed: What the hell?

All the presents begins to kick Kazin.

Peter: You killed the only thing who knew how to defeat Zeon, emo-bastard!

Creed: Maybe Mitula could help you… But she seems to have problems right now.

Rick appears suddenly from nowhere.

Peter: Ekkk!

Rick: We must save the goddess of earth for the peace and justice of this world!

Peter: Stop doing that, annoying brat!!!

Creed: I can only help you with 4 warriors to join your group:

The sailor senshi healer Karna: In the name of Rune I'll punish you!

The ugly face warrior Randolf: Who you call ugly, fuck face?

The old weird mage Tyrin: …

The snob stupid knight Eric: I'm better than you all! Where is my sword?

* * *

The force goes back to New Granseal. They buy new weapons there and get promoted: 

Bowie promoted to BIHO (Bitch-Hero)

Sarah promoted to MBCH (Master-Bitch)

Chester promoted to SPPN (Sleepy-Paladin)

Jaha promoted to BLBN (Blue-Baron)

Kazin promoted to EMOW (Emo-Wizard)

Slade promoted to CHNJ (Chuunin-Ninja)

Peter promoted to ICTK (Ironic-Turkey)

May promoted to 4LSP (4-Legs-Sniper)

Luke promoted to NUCH (Non-Usefull-Character)

Rick promoted to PWRG (Power-Ranger)

Elric promoted to SKSP (Skinny-Sniper)

Karna promoted to PGSS (Pretty-Guardian-Sailor-Senshi)

Randolf promoted to UGGL (Ugly-Gladiator)

Tyrin promoted to IMTR (Ice-Master)

Eric promoted to PITA (Pain-In-The-Ass)

Kiwi promoted to NCDG (Non-Cute-Dragon)

Gerhalt promoted to HKWF (Hulk-Wolf)

Gerhalt is transformed in a big green hairy beast.

Gerhalt: Gerhalt angry!

Everyone: O.o

Gerhalt: Gerhalt smash!

Evertone: Ekkk!!!

Gerhalt starts destroying the chapel. Everyone pee their pants and run away except May and Sarah who start to hug him.

May: Awwwwwww! Look all that hair… Kawaii!

Sarah: So much cute… Like a Teddy Bear!

Gerhalt begins to puke and returns to normal.

Jaha: Um… guys? I think we forgot something…

Chester: Upsie! We forgot about Oddler in Creed's mansion.

Peter: For the best, he was kinda annoying.

* * *

King New Granseal: Well, tell us what happened. 

They do it.

King New Granseal: So my whore-daughter could be still alive?

Astral: We'll go to Tristan to take Mitula's advice.

Bowie: We?

Astral: Of course I'm coming along. Mitula is the hottest chick in SFII.

Sarah bitch-slaps Sir Astral

Sir Astral tags along with the Bitch Force!

Skinny elf girl: Excuse me!

Elric: Oh no! She's followed me!

He hides behind Chester.

S-E-G: I think my slave Elric is with you. So I'm joining you.

Janet (S-E-G's name) joins the Bitch Force!

An "unknown" voice comes behind Chester: He's at headquarters, wait him there.

S-E-G: Ok ;3

Everyone glares at Elric.

Elric: That's my girlfriend, Janet. A nymphomaniac that only wants sex from me. It was exhausting! u.u

Slade: Ooook… Shall we go already? There aren't many things in this town left to steal…

Everyone glare at Slade.

Slade: Ups! Did I say that aloud?

Everyone start kicking Slade (Including the King and the Minister)

* * *

They went to North cliff and enter a cave. Of course they get lost. For more info, search Shining in the darkness 2. 

Peter: Psst! Bitch! Shining in the darkness 2 doesn't exist!

**Author:** **Who are you calling bitch, fucking bird?! Do you want me to create in this story a thanksgiving day's dinner, annoying "TURKEY"?**

Peter: Ekkk!

* * *

When the Bitch Force get out from the cave, they arrive to a town full of unwelcoming signals. So they don't stay too much. In the exit they find a curious scene. 

Little-green-ugly-devil: You were going to south Parmecia to get new porn, didn't you?

Centaur: Um…well…could be…

Green-Ugly….: Paladins of Pacalon are sex-maniacs! Higgins, haven't you any pride? Bitch!

Higgins bitch 1: Shut up! Sir Higgins is the best soldier!

Higgins: Give me more praise or I'll spank you later

Higgins bitch 2: He's the biggest soldier!

Higgins: That's better, bitch!

Green-Ug….: Let's cut the crap!

Two lizard men screw Higgins' bitches.

Higgins: You're not an ordinary devil…

Geshp: You got that right bitch! I'm Geshp, Zeon's 2nd favorite whore!

Higgins: You could have screwed me long time ago. Why am I still alive?

Geshp: You'll see, smart-ass!

A demon appears and begins to enter Higgins' body to posses him.

Geshp: Soon you'll be another whore in the devil army, MWAHAHAHA!!!

Astral: We won't let you enter him that way!

Bowie: Yeah! You could at least have used some lube!

Sarah bitch-slaps Bowie.

Karna: We'll punish you!

Gesph: Who are you? A whore-unit from the south? Where did you come from?

Peter: Um… from the south… **¬.¬**

Bowie: And from Grans island.

Then a ring tone is heard. Geshp takes out a cell phone from his robes.

Geshp: Yes? Oh! Hi, Master Zeon... Aha…. Mm… Sure! Really? No way!...

Bowie: Em…

Geshp: Hey! This conversation is private! I'm going now but my army will screw you. Bye!

And he disappears.

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

They look at Higgins. 

Peter: Is this bitch alive?

Astral: No.

Kazin starts to cry like a baby. **TT.TT**

Jaha: Jeez…

May: Aw… he was really big… I don't want him to die!

Astral: He's not dead.

Bowie: WTF?

Astral: I think he's now a Vampire.

Sarah bitch-slaps Kazin before he does something.

Higgins: Wha…What happened?

Slade: Are you ok?

Higgins: Yup! I feel better than ever. But I'm thirsty.

Everyone get a step away from Higgins.

Higgins: Anyway, that can wait. Are you from the south?

May: Yes.

Higgins: Great! In Pacalon we need more people to fight devils. Come with me!

Sarah: But we have to see Mitula!

Higgins: I've got porn there for you…

Astral: Let's go to Pacalon first to read…

He saw Sarah's hand approaching.

Astral: I mean, to rest and help those people against devils.

Rick appears suddenly behind them: Sure thing! Let's save this land!

Peter kicks him, annoyed.

* * *

They arrive to Pacalon. They found it's a town of centaurs 

In the castle they find Vicar Frayja.

Vicar Frayja: I've committed a terrible sin… I need a punishment.

A centaur appears with a whip: Come to my room! I'll punish you there!

Peter rolled eyes.

Astral: So, let's go now?

Bowie: Yeah! I'm feeling quite insecure in here. "glances to centaur's crotches"

* * *

Before arriving Tristan, they arrive to Pangoat bridge, where they see problems. 

Slade: Look at that hot chick surrounded by monsters!

Chester: OMG! Tentacle porn!

Sarah bitch-kicks him in the groin.

Karna jumps into the bridge: Stop right there! I can't forgive you monsters for attacking a NPC. I'm the pretty warrior who fights for love and justice! And in the name of the Bitch Force, I'll punish you!

A giant worm bitch-slaps her.

Peter: Thanks, Giant Worm!

Hot-chick: Stop being jerks and help me! Help!

Jaha: Let's help her. Maybe she'll be very, very grateful later.

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

Hot-chick: Thank you! Can you help me? I sprained my leg. 

All excited Bowie: Sure!

But Sir Astral goes there first.

Astral: Let me do it!

Angry Bowie: Ok…

Higgins: Let's go! Maybe in Tristan I can have a drink. I'm soo thirsty!

Everyone get a step far away from Higgins.

Astral: Wait!

Luke: What's now?

Astral: We can't go now.

Slade: Why not?

Hot-chick: Because of me. I'm Cameela. One of the main whores of Zeon.

Elric: How did you know she was a devil, Sir Astral?

Astral: Because she has blue skin, brainless elf!

Elric: Oh!

Peter: Why are you here, bitch?

Cameela: I'm here because of Bowie's jewels!

Bowie: You got that right, bitch! I've got such extremely great jewels even the devils fall for them. MWAHAHA!

Everyone glares at Bowie. Sarah bitch-kick him in the… jewels.

B: Ough!... Oh… You mean… on my neck?

Cameela: Weirdo…

Peter: Go away, bitch! You'll get nothing from us!

Cameela: Give it to me and I'll spare Sir Astral!

Astral: Think again, whore!

He throws her a Kamehameha.

Cameela: Ooops! What a surprising old bitch. I didn't thought of taking the jewel now anyway, but I was bored. Ok! See you soon, bitches!

She disappears.

Peter: Well, WTH was that?

Jaha: Who cares? We should go. Chester is asleep again.

May: Did a Dark mage cast sleep on him?

Jaha: No. He's always like that.

Chester: That's not true…Zzzz….

Higgins: Let's go! Mitula is waiting.

Rick: Justice is waiting too!

Peter: Don't appear like that, fucking brat! -

They finally arrive to Tristan, land of candy, cookies and cake. To go to Mitula's shrine they have first to enter a cave and… Yes! You guessed it! They got lost AGAIN. They finally-finally arrive to the shrine.


	2. Chapter 2

Author note: The second and last part. Just to make it shorter that the first intro chapter, anything from this isn't mine(Well, not "anything", you know...), just the will to write and pass a good time. Enjoy!

* * *

In Mitula's Shrine.

Janet: Helloooo! It seems that nobody is here… Great! Come on Elric, I'm horny!

Elric: Nobody? And what about the whole members of the Bitch force?

Janet: I prefer your member.

Peter: Stop it, bitch! We have to find Mitula.

Voice at the main door: Welcome to Mitula's shrine!

Astral: Who are you?

Zalbard: I'm Zalbard, One of Zeon's Greater whores!

Peter: A Greater whore! Listen up, bitches. The devil who attacked Bedoe was also a Greater whore!

Luke: That's true! Even Volcanon was nearly defeated by him.

Zalbard: Are you talking about Sir OddEye? He was defeated and now we don't know a shit about his whereabouts. He was Zeon's first bitch! I'll be his first once I put my hands on Bowie's jewels.

Bowie: No way, you pervert!

Sarah bitch-slaps Bowie.

Peter: Sir Astral, what do we do?

Astral: Oddeye…

Peter: Sir Astral?

Astral: Oddgay…

Peter: Bitch! Wake up!

Chester: Zzzzeu? I was awake!

Jaha: Suuure…

Chester impales Jaha in his javelin.

Astral: Don't scare me, fucking bird!

Rick: Yeah! That's my job, justice lovers.

Slade kicks Rick.

Peter: What's up with you, old geezer?

Bowie: Alzheimer… **¬.¬**

Astral kicks Bowie: Let's go!

* * *

They enter. 

Zalbard: Welcome!

Peter: Ekkkk!

Bowie: My eyes! Somebody take them out, please!

Luke: "Puke"

Janet: We'll let the sex for later, Elric…

Elric: It's a Miracle…

Chester: Somebody awake me, please, what a nightmare!

Jaha: Weren't you already awake?

Karna: I'll punish you for such a face!

Gerhalt(in his hulk-wolf form): Gerhalt… scared!

Kazin: **TT********TT**

Slade: NOT-LOOKING NO JUTSU!

May: God! Can somebody put a bag in his head?

Sarah: Umh… Randolf doesn't seem so ugly now…

Randolf: Hey!

Zalbard: Nobody likes me… I'm going to write in my journal. "_sob_"

Peter: Wait! What about Mitula?

Zalbard: I'm not telling! "stick out tongue"

Astral: We must fight!

Bowie: You know what the word "WE" means, don't you?

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

Zalbard: No… Why I have to die? 

Peter: Because you are too ugly.

Bowie: Yeah! You're worst than THE RING's kid. I nearly died looking to your face.

Tyrin: Ew! Gross!

Peter: Now, where is Mitula, bitch?

Zalbard: She's gone shopping. I invaded while she was away.

Mitula: I'm home!

Zalbard: Shit! She's back!

Mitula: Who are you? What are you doing in my shrine?

She starts to shine.

Zalbard: Noooooooo! The light! Fucking bitch!

He disappears.

Peter: Goddess Mitula, we need your help!

Mitula: I know. I was visiting Volcanon while that ugly demon invaded. He told me about Zeon. But he made me promise I wouldn't help you.

Kazin: We're doomed. **TT********TT**

Mitula: If Zeon regains all his power neither me nor Volcanon will be able to beat him.

Kazin: So doomed… **TT********TT**

Mitula: The jewel of darkness contains his evil powers.

Astral: Fine, then we keep it.

MItula: Arc Valley is where the evil (and porn) gathers. He will regain his power eventually.

Peter: Crap!

Mitula starts to disappear.

Astral: Wait! Where are you going?

Mitula: I've got a life you know?

Peter: Can you give us some advice?

Mitula: Let me think about it…um…No. Volcanon doesn't allow me to do it.

Peter: That bitch!

Mitula: But in the storytellers' room you'll find help. Bye!

Mitula vanishes.

Kazin: Reaaally doomed! **TT********TT**

Tyrin smacks him.

In the storytellers room they find an elf girl.

Taya: Hiya!

Peter: Who are you?

Taya: I'm Taya, a sorcerer. Mitula can't help you but I know all you need to know.

Bowie: Lucky!

Taya joins the Bitch Force!

Taya: The only thing we have to do is weaken Zeon. Just that.

Peter: **¬.¬**Yeah! Just that! Useless bitch…

Bowie: So we have to fight him!

Rick appears suddenly: For the sake of this world!

Peter: fucking bitch! He kicks Rick

Astral: We have to go back to Grans! Let's go bitches!

Jaha: How? We don't have a ship!

Taya: Near here there is the Moun town. There is the Nazca plane!

Rohde: Oh! The Nazca plane! That's great! Marvelous! Wonderful! So happy!...

Peter: You really don't know what is it, do you?

Rohde: …No. ****

Sarah bitch-slaps Rohde.

Voice from above: Hey! Wait for me!

Luke: What?

Birdman: I finally find you! Remember me?

Astral: No.

Jaha: Alzheimer…

Birdman: Bowie saved me when I was little in Bedoe. I'm Skreech!

Bowie: No way! You were smaller than a football!

Peter: Steroids…

Skreech: I'm joining to thank you.

Bowie: If only birdmen weren't so lame in defense…

Luke: Hey!

Skreech joins the Bitch Force!

* * *

They arrive to Moun. 

Taya: This is the gate of Moun. Pass the town and we'll find the Nazca plane.

Peter: Em… It's locked.

Taya: Ops!

Astral: Can you open it?

Taya: No.

Peter: Useless bitch!

Slade: No problemo! It doesn't exist yet a lock I can't open.

* * *

30 minutes later. 

Tired Slade: I can't open it. Fucking lock!

Peter: Another useless bitch!

Taya: Of course you can't. It's locked using magic. Only the one who locked it can open it.

Slade: You knew it all along?

Taya: Of course!

Slade kicks Taya..

Peter: Come on, Useless Force! Let's go back to Pacalon. Ugly Frayja will open the door.

Astral: How do you know he was the one who locked it?

Peter. Well, it's printed on the door, look!

At the door is written: _Vicar Frayja locked this door. Please, absent of opening it!_

Slade: You knew it all along?

Peter: Of course!

Slade kicks Peter.

* * *

When they arrive to Pacalon they go into the castle. 

Frayja: I've committed a terrible sin. I can't live with what I did!

Astral: What?

Frayja: I locked Moun's door to avoid devils invading Parmecia, but the people in that town…

Peter: We need you to open it.

Frayja: Oh! You'll help me saving the survivors? Thank you!

Peter: Yeah! Whatever…

* * *

When they get out they find Geshp. 

Geshp: MWAHAHAHA! I'm glad you get out! Now I'll make you open that door, bitch!

Peter: We were going to open it before you appear, retarded bastard!

Geshp: Oh! Well… I knew it…yeah... **¬.¬**

Bowie: Suuuure…

He vanishes.

* * *

In their way to Moun they found some devils. 

FIGHT!

Karna: Evil things! In the name of Rune, I'll punish you!

Jaha: This is getting boring you know?

Chester: Zzzz…

Pegasus knight: I'm bored of devil's old porn… Hey, Bitch Force! Do you have new porn?

Slade: We've got some NEW videos from NEW Granseal.

Pegasus Knight: Cool! I'm changing sides! I'm Jaro, a mutated centaur. I can fly!

Bowie: What has he smoked?

Jaro: I'm so high!

Luke: Antidote herbs, no doubt.

Bowie: Do you have some?

Luke: Not here.

Bowie: Aw…

Jaro joins the Bitch Force!

WIN!

* * *

In Moun's gate. 

Frayja: Ábrete Sésamo!

Astral: Wow! Ancient speaking!

Suddenly appearing Rick: Legendary!

Peter kicks both of them.

Sarah: Helloooo! Somebody here?

Janet: Empty! Fine! Ok, Elric, you know, I like it hard and slow.

Elric: **¬.¬**

Elric takes out a photo and showed it to her. She faints.

Tyrin: What was that?

Elric: A photo I took from Zalbard. **:3**

Tyrin: Gross! You're ill, you knew it?

Slade: Could somebody appears before Chester falls asleep?

Jaha: Too late…

Chester: Zzzz…

A Devil Army appears.

Devilbitch1: Look! more people to rape!

Frayja: No! I'm too late! I committed a huge sin…

Kazin: Poor people… **TT********TT**

Devilbitch2: We aren't satisfied yet.

Elric points to fainted Janet: Well, you can take her. I'm sure you can't keep up with her…

Sarah smacks Elric in the back of the head.

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

They see someone in a hole in the ground. 

Bowie: Who are you?

Robot: Moun's survivors.

Astral: Why didn't you say something earlier?

Robot: We didn't want Slade to steal our porn.

Slade: Mwahaha! My fame precedes me!

Sarah bitch-slaps him.

* * *

In the hole they found the survivors. 

Dwarf-like-Gimli: You fight well!

Bowie: Thanks!

D-l-G: I see you've got in there more elf bitches than dwarf bitches. That's bad. I'm joining you! My name is Gyan.

Gyan joins the Bitch Force!

* * *

Slade: Look! We have half the cast of the lord of the rings! Gandalf (Astral), Aragorn(Bowie), Legolas(Elric) and Gimli(Gyan). 

Sarah: Don't forget Galadriel.

Taya: Thank you, Sarah!

Sarah: I was referring to me, stupid whore!

Taya: Well, I didn't know Galadriel was a retarded bitch! **ò.****ó**

CATFIGHT!

Astral bitch-slaps both of them.

Peter: Um… Sir Astral?

Astral: What? Do you want a bitch-slap too?

Peter: No. But I see you've explained Higgins his condition.

He points to Higgins who is drinking the devils' blood.

Astral: Well, better them than us.

Tyrin: Gross!

Kazin points Higgins: An underworld creature!

Peter: Here we go again…

Kazin: Die! BLAZE!

But the blaze didn't affect him.

Peter slaps Kazin.

Higgins: Hey! That didn't affect me!

Astral: It's difficult to destroy you because you're a vampire now. And you'll be that till Zeon is sealed again

Peter in a low voice: And then he will be normal again?

Astral in a low voice: No, he will be dead.

Tyrin: Still gross!

Frayja: I'm still horrified by my sin…

Slade: Whatever…

Bowie: Look what I found!

Eric: My sword?

Karna: ECCHII! slaps him

Bowie: **¬.¬**…No…a Clay arm!

Peter: So what? You want a prize or something?

Astral: We'd better take the Nazca Plane now. Somebody knows where is it?

Robot: Wait! I'm going with you!

Bowie: You want to fight with us?

Robot: No way! I'm a Hippie. Flower power and all that crap. But I know about the plane. I'm Zynk.

Zynk go with the Bitches!

* * *

They find the plane. It has the form of a giant bird. They also find Cameela and her whore army. 

Camela: Hiya, bitches!

Geshp appears: Wait, bitch! You can't go on your own!

Cameela: As if you were gonna help me!

Geshp: Well, actually…No

Cameela: Well, then go and fuck yourself!

Cameela throws a fireball (even if she's not a magic user **o.O**) He dodges.

Geshp: Mwahahaha! I'll se you in Disneyland (Devil's hell)

He vanishes.

Cameela: Hope not! I can't stand your silly laugh. But you hear that bitches? He says I'm gonna lose. In your dreams!

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

Luke: What do you say now, evil-whore? 

Cameela: Ok, you're not just common whores…

Geshp: Told you, bitch! MWAHAHAHA!!!

Cameela: Noooo! That laugh kills me….!

She dies.

Geshp: Ok, bitches! Take the plane and come to Grans. I'll welcome you with a bunch of prism flowers. MWAHAHAHA!

He vanishes.

Taya: Flowers! How kind of him!

Sarah: Wench!

Frayja: Oh… so much sins…

Astral: What the heck are Prism Flowers?

Peter: Probably a trap. Crap!

Appearing-suddenly-Rick: Our justice will never let us fall in any insidious trap!

Peter slaps him.

* * *

They enter the plane. 

Astral: how do we make it fly?

Peter: Rohde! Come here, you coward bitch! (he hasn't get out from the caravan since Taros shrine)

Rohde: What?

Peter: You know how to drive it?

Rohde: ….No!

Peter: I'm surrounded by useless bitches!

Zynk: I can.

He takes out some cables from his body and connects them to the main…Thing? The plane starts to move upwards.

Zynk (girly tone): Welcome to ancient's airlines. Please, put your trays in its position and fasten your seatbelts.

Randolf: What the…?

Peter: OMG! We're flying! I can believe it. Wonderful!

Astral: Since you are a fucking bird, I don't know why the hell do you get so impressed.

Slade: Woah!

Chester: Zzzz…

Jaha: This guy isn't half horse, but half marmot.

Gerhalt: "Puke"

Kazin: **TT.TT**

Luke: We're so high!

Jaro: So high!

Skreech: Fly away!

May: What are these three smoking?

Bowie: I don't know but I want some…

Kiwi: …

Janet: Come on, Elric! Once more!

Elric: I'm tired… **--.--**U

Just puked Sarah: Opsie! Sorry for the mess, Taya.

Taya: Whore! **Ò.Ó**

Rohde: Eww!!!

Higgins: Do you have something to drink?

Tyrin: …No!

Eric: Have you seen my sword?

Karna: Ecchii!! "slaps him" Punish you, hentai freak!

Frayja: Everybody sing a sin, dooda, dooda, everybody sing a sin, all the dooda day…(singing)

* * *

Later… 

Astral: Um… I've seen something flashing.

Jaha: Sorry, it was me taking a photo from Chester. He's drooling asleep. Ha, ha!

Chester: ZzzzEu... I was awake! Zzzz…

Astral: No! I meant on the window!

Peter: Poor Astral…

Bowie: So old that he see things…

BOOM!

Slade: What was that?

Zynk: They are firing at the plane! Beware!

Astral (Kicking Bowie and Peter): Told you, bitches!

The plane crashes.

Astral: Evacuate! Old bearded wizards first!

The rest of the force start kicking Astral.

They evacuate without injuries (except Astral. Too much kicking)

Bowie: That was close!

Astral: Let's go to that dojo over there!

Slade: Why? It's not in our way to Granseal!

Astral: Because we'll find another Master monk in there to join us, annoying rat! Come on!

* * *

In the Dojo… 

Girl voice: Ekkk! Perverts! Don't look at my precious nude body!

B Force males: Where, where? O¬O

Girl voice: No, please! My virgin, NUDE, wonderful body must not be seen IN THE WATERFALL!

B Force males: But where are you?

Girl: Stay away from the waterfall that is AT THE LEFT side 20 feet from the dojo! I won't let you see me in my splendorous NUDE well formed body!

B Force females: Whore!

Astral: I know that voice! Have we met before?

Peter: Good try, old man!

Girl: Are you Sir Astral? It's me, Sheela. Remember me?

Astral: How I'm gonna forget that incredible blow…

Sarah bitch-slaps him.

Sarah: Ah…. So long since the last time I did this…

* * *

Astral: So you're a MMNK? And want to join? What a surprise! 

B Force: **¬.¬**

Sheela: What are you talking about? I don't want to join!

May: I didn't either, but it's in the script. See?

Bowie: Hey that's MY script!

May ignores him.

Sheela: Now that I think about it, Red Baron killed my fiancé. I want revenge against the devils. I'll spank them all!

Peter: Please, not another emo-character.

Sheela: Not emo but angst! Must… destroy… devils.

Frayja: I'm still horrified for my sin…

Kazin: Hey! I'm the emo-character here, got it? Will you leave the people in Moun to rest in Peace? (or "in Pieces")

Frayja: I was talking about peeking at Sarah changing clothes…

Sarah: HENTAI!!!

Sarah bitch-kicks Frayja in the groin.

* * *

Geshp: MWAHAHA! That's what happens to everyone who dares messing with me! 

Astral: You saying, bitch?

Geshp: Ekkkk! wets himself in horror and goes away screaming like a little girl

Astral: Coward whore…

* * *

Later… 

Geshp: MWAHAHA!

Astral: You again… Let me guess, you are going to go away again leaving just useless devils to stop us. If you haven't notice before, it's not working, bitch!

Geshp: That's why I bring also a good fighter. Come to play, Red Baron!

A Hunk in red armor appears. Geshp goes away.

Bowie kicks Astral: You had to give him ideas, old bastard!

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

Astral: I see… 

Astral exorcices Red Baron.

Red Baron: What…what happened? Sheela, is that you?

Sheela: You…

She starts kissing him.

Everyone: Ewwww!

Chester: OMG! Tentacle porn!

Sarah bitch-slaps Chester.

Slade: Why tentacle?

Chester: He's a devil monster isn't him?

Sheela: No. you're wrong.

Taya: You said Red Baron killed your fiancé. And now you jump him all over? Whore…

Sheela: This is Lemon, commander of the Galam Army, my fiancé. He was turned evil. That was like killing him.

Peter: This is the same lame excuse given in Starswarrants to Luke Skyrunner about his father.

Bowie: Star Wars?

Peter: No! I've said Starwarrants! Star Wars has copyright, bitch!

Lemon: I'm not the same as before.

Bowie: So are you now Yaoi? Hentai? Or maybe Yuri?

Sarah bitch-slaps Bowie.

Lemon: I've done horrible things! My sins are too great to bare…

Frayja: Welcome to my world…

Lemon: I'm going to kill myself somewhere…

He goes.

Sheela: I must not be emo, I must not be emo, I must… Ekkkkk! #$&!!!!!

Peter: Holy shit!

Sheela: This is even worst that leveling up and just gaining 1HP! ANGST!!!

Astral: Poor bitch! But the bastard is now an immortal vampire. It will be difficult to kill.

Chester: So there is gonna be a gore scene…

Tyrin: Gross!

Luke and Skreech from above them: Hey! There is a town full of dwarves there!

* * *

They stay some days in the town. After going in their way to Galam town… 

Gyan: It's a pity we couldn't use all that much Mithril you're carrying. There is a locksmith who can turn it into great weapons…

Bowie to Slade: And why didn't he say that when we were there?

Slade to Bowie: Because he's a bitch.

Bowie kicks Gyan.

Eric: Maybe they can make me a new sword.

Chester: Ok, I have enough! You're a fucking centaur, dude! LANCES and SPEARS only! Got it? You can't equip anything else!… tha betch!

* * *

They go back to the dwarven town, AGAIN. They get new cool weapons, but any gisarme… Damnit! 

They arrive to Galam.

They exit Galam.

How exciting!

* * *

Geshp: MWAHAHAHA! 

B-Force: U.U

Geshp: What?

Peter: We were betting how much time would you last here this time before going away leaving a devil army.

Geshp: Not this time bitches. Zeon has given me the last opportunity to screw you.

Peter: So you're gonna fight?! Ooooh…. I own your ass so much… **ò.ó**

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

Geshp: Please, spare me! 

Astral: Fine! You've lost your powers…

Peter: Really?

Geshp: **T.T** yes…

He starts to go.

Astral: Not so fast!

Peter: Yeah! You're now our bitch!

He starts to burn.

Everybody: Ekkk!

He dies.

Rohde: Um… Spontaneous combustion, no doubt.

Tyrin smacks him: That's Zeon's power, you moron!

Suddenly appearing Rick: Let's go to fight that evil creature!

Astral, Tyrin and Rohde suffer a heart attack.

Peter kicks Rick.

* * *

After recovering they go to Yeel. 

Gyan: This place is empty!

Sheela: Aw… I wanted to kick devil's ass…

Janet: Then nobody is gonna interrupt us. "winks at Elric"

He show her Zalbard's photo. She faints.

Luke: Let's go to that bar!

Chester: I want a double Vodka!

Jaha: But the alcohol makes you even more sleepy…

Karna: Yay! A piano! I'm going to play it.

Then she plays a creepy melody.

Suddenly a priest appears at the bar's door.

Priest: Evil devils! You found our hidden entrance in the church. Burn in Disneyland (Hell)! BLAZE! **TT********TT**

Peter: That must be a relative of Kazin…

Slade: Then we know what to do… Sarah, Could you…?

Sarah bitch-slaps the priest.

Slade: Thanks, Sarah!

Sarah: My pleasure!

Peter; We're not devils, emo-priest! We're the Bitch Force!

Suddenly appearing Rick: The LEGENDARY Bitch Force!

Peter: Whatever…annoying brat!

Astral: Ok, emo-bitch! Guide us to the NOT-secret entrance in the Church!

Kazin: I don't know about that…

Astral: Not you, bastard! The other emo-bitch!

Bowie: That's why there is only one emo-charcter in this kind of groups…

Peter: One is even too much!

Emo-priest: How did you know about the secret entrance in the church? It's secret, you know…

Peter: But it was you who you told us…

Emo-priest: Oh…you're right!

Peter:

* * *

They enter a hidden passage and found Yell survivors. Clearly a copy of Moun hidden place. 

NPC-till now: Welcome, Bitch Force! I've been waiting for you.

Peter: If you knew we were coming you could at least have told this priest-bastard!

Kazin: Oh, you're Chaz! One of the thousands sons of Master Hawel.

May: Thousands?

Slade: He was busy…

Astral: The fucking whore!

Chaz: They say the crazy devils are responsible of my father's death.

Bowie looked at Kazin: Surely it was somebody who was quite crazy…

Kazin: **9,9 **

Chaz: I want revenge!

Sheela: Join the club!

Frayja: We have t-shirts…

Taya: First of all we need the Holy Sword!

Everyone: The what?

Taya: The sword which has the power to stop Zeon. Bowie! Your jewels will guide us!

Bowie: My… you Bitch!

Taya: I was talking to the jewels in your neck, moron!

Jaha: Really, Bowie. That joke is even older than Sir Astral.

Astral smacks Jaha.

* * *

They go out of the hidden place. 

Luke: Look at that!

He pointed to one of the roofs.

Bowie: Is that…Orange?

Peter: It's Lemon, silly!

Sheela: Hi darling!

He jumped to the floor creating a huge hole. He gets out unharmed.

Lemon: Why can't I die? Guys! Can you kill me?

Bowie: I'm busy now. Time is dear to me.

Rohde: Stop doing that, brat!

Kazin: We're all gonna die fighting the Demon Bitch: ZEON. You can come and die with us.

May: Don't be so optimistic! Jeez…

Lemon: Ok, I'm joining!

Lemon joins the Bitch Force!

Chester: Another undead…

Jaha: Yeah! We are gonna be the army of the undead…

Slade: I liked that film!

Bowie: Ok, everyone! I can sense the holy sword. I feel a tingling in my jewels.

Karna: ECCHI!!! "bitch-slaps Bowie"

Sarah: Bitch! I'm the one who bitch-slaps here! "bitch-slaps Bowie"

Karna: Sorry… "smacks Bowie"…Better?

Sarah: Yeah!

Bowie: Ouch…I was talking about my other jewels…in the neck… **TT.**

* * *

They find the crypt. 

Elric: Creepy… and NOT empty, Janet!

Janet: Aw…

May: It is really dark in here!

Eric: True. I don't find my… "Chester looks at him angrily"…Lance.

Karna: HENTAI! "Kicks Eric"

Eric: I can't say anything… **TT.TT****U**

Gerhalt: That's why I don't talk.

Peter: I thought it was because the silly author didn't find any stupid sentence for you…

**Author(singing):** **Peeeeteeeeer…thanksgiving daaaaaaayyyyyy….**

Peter: I mean… The glorious author is waiting for the accurate moment for you to say something, wolf-guy.

**Author:** **That's better, bitch!**

Jaha: This is where you took the jewels from, didn't you?

Slade: Yes. But I didn't know this would happen. How would I know those jewels were such a seal?

Skreech: Well, is written here, see: _Please, don't take these jewels. They are the seal of the Devil King Zeon. I f you do, devils will appear, Granseal will be destroyed and the bitch force will fight. Yours sincerely, Mitula (Goddess) P.S. The holy sword is also here, but please; don't take it unless Zeon is awakened._

Sarah kicks Slade. They take the sword.

Jaha: How are we gonna go to the tower (where porn gathers)? Granseal was destroyed!

Bowie: My jew…"looks at Karna carefully" I mean, the things attached to my neck indicates me another entrance to the tower of the ancients, follow me!

* * *

The Bitch Force follows their leader till a statue of a giant skull. The statue opens his mouth and they see the entrance. They enter to find a maze waiting for them. Fortunately, the Force has flying bitches and finds the way out easily. 

Familiar voice: Welcome, Bitch Force! I've been waiting for you!

Chaz: Hey! Don't quote me!

Bowie: Isn't that Oddler? Hey Oddler, long time no seen!

Oddler: **¬.¬**

Bowie: Why don't you look at me when I'm talking to you? Are you blind or something?

He starts kicking Bowie: YES! I AM BLIND! YOU BASTARD!

Bowie: Ok, ok! I get it! But why are you here?

Chester: Yeah! We forgot about you in… "Jaha kicks him"

Jaha: He means that we left you with Creed to regain your memory.

Oddler: Well, thanks! I remembered then who I am.

Jaha: It was nothing.

OddEye: Thanks to you I finally remember that I'm the greater whore-devil OddEye!

Jaha: Crap!

OddEye: I'm sad I've got to fight you…

Bowie: Really?

OddEye: In fact…NO! I'm a devil. Does somebody listen when I'm talking? UU

May: I don't want to fight against Oddler… he's hot!

Sarah bitch-slaps May.

OddEye: We don't have to fight…

Bowie: Really?

Oddler: Of course we have to! Jeez man… Um… I wonder if you will fall in this too… I'm changing sides! I'll fight alongside you!

Bowie: Really?

Oddler: **¬.¬**

Peter smacks Bowie in the back of the head.

Slade: And this is our leader?

Jaha: We're screwed up.

Kazin: Sooooo doomed… **TToTT**

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

OddEye: Well, this is the end… I guess I've lived too much. 

Bowie takes his hand: This is sad… "tear"

OddEye: Bowie…

Peter: Ok! Cut the yaoi scene right now!

All the girls kick Peter: NO!!!!

Sarah (with sparkling eyes): Go on, go on!

May: Nyaaaa!

Karna: Kawaiii…

Taya: So cute…

Sheela: So hot!

Janet starts eating popcorn.

Bowie and OddEye: **¬.¬**

Oddler: I was once a Bitch Force member. I even fought alongside your father. Compared to him, Bowie…

Bowie: Yes?

OddEye: You sucks!

Bowie: Bastard!

He vanishes.

* * *

They leave that place and go on their way to the tower. In the way they find some devils, but get ride of them easily. They enter the final room. 

Familiar voice: Welcome, Bitch Force! I've been waiting for you!

Chaz: You're doing it on purpose, don't you?

Astral: That's… King Galam!

Lemon: My king…

Astral: Oh there is the princess! She seems to be fainted.

K. Galam: She was gonna be the sacrifice to Zeon's final awakening. But she made me think it twice.

Astral: Really?

K.Galam: Yes. Now you'll be the ones that I'll sacrifice!

Sarah: I knew she was a whore!

FIGHT!

WIN!

* * *

P.Elis: Yawn! 

Peter: The bitch is awakening!

Chester: I wasn't sleeping!

Peter: I meant the princess… U.U

Sarah: Aww… I thought she was dead…

P.Elis: Uhm… Too many men in here. I'm in one of the castle's orgies?

Taya: Whore!

P.Elis: Oh, I remember! I was kidnapped. But, who are you?

Peter: I'm Peter, a phoenix.

P.Elis: The legendary bird!

Peter: Legendary my ass! Annoying earthlings…

Astral: Are you ok, Princess Elis?

P.Elis: I think so.

Bowie- _Damn! Now I'll have to ditch Sarah for this Bi_...-

Astral: Princess, we're here to save you and the world!

Jaha: Really?

Elric: Well…

Rick: We'll fight till the very end!

Karna: We won't forgive any devil!

Luke: Yeah, uhm…what they said…

Randolf: Whatever…

Slade: Sure thing! If the world goes down, there won't be anything for me to steal.

Astral: We've been a long way since….Blah, blah….

Kazin: So many zombies… **TT********TT**

P.Elis: This is too boring…Zzzzz…..!

Taya: What a whore!

Then there is an earthquake.

Astral: Oh! I nearly forgot about the other devil!

Chester: Alzheimer…

Bowie: You mean, Zeon? "smacked by Peter"

Peter: No, Sherlock! He meant Mickey Mouse! Jeez…

Zeon appears in a hole of the nearest wall.

Zeon: Grrr! You destroyed my minions! And you stole my porn!

Everybody look at Slade.

Slade: What? It wasn't me! **9,9**

Sarah: Yeah, sure…

Astral: We'd better go and come again later.

Peter: Coward whore! We can't!

Bowie: True! Those skull faces in the walls and floor creep me out! That doesn't make me want to go and come back later…

Peter: I meant that the princess is asle… I mean, fainted. I'm not gonna carry it!

Astral: Lazy turkey!

Lemon: Besides, we're surrounded by enemies.

Gyan: I don't see them.

Bowie: Psst! You must wait till the battle begins to see them… U.U

Astral: Bowie, believe in your sword and jewels. Use them to fight with Zeon!

B. Force: ¬.¬

Bowie: Old pervert!

Karna: ECCHI!

Astral: Come on! Cut up the stupid jokes! We must fight Zeon now!

Bowie: Do you realize how much you use the word "WE"?

FIGHT!

LOSE!

B. Force: Ekkkkk!

**Author: Just kidding…**

WIN!

* * *

K.Galam: Where am I? Lemon is that you? I can't see very well 

Lemon: You forgot your glasses.

King Galam: I'm dying... I don't want to! Lemon, tell me why…

Lemon: Ok! …Why.

P.Elis: Poor King Galam, you were possessed by the dark side.

King Galam: I'm a moron and don't understand. Are you Princess Elis? I haven't seen you since that orgy in my castle. Let me see your face.

He then grabs Elis by the arms.

Lemon: King Galam!

King Galam: I'm not Galam, you fools!

Peter: Well, that's because Galam is a country. You are King Galam.

KG: No!

All try to guess.

Bowie: You're Odd eye, the bastard…

KG: NO!!

Sarah: You're Cameela!

Taya: With that beard? Brainless whore…

Sarah: Look who's talking, the fucking bitch!

KG: I'm Zeon! Zeon!

Astral: But you died!

Zeon: Never! You don't know a shit about me!

Jaha: Well I'm sure I don't wanna know.

Zeon: Your swords can't hurt me. I'm too wide; I'm mean, too strong! If you dare to do something, I'll screw her!

Sarah: So what? I mean… Oh noes!

Zeon: Bowie, turkey, come here!

Peter: What should we do, Bowie?

Bowie: OH! So now you ask me for advice?

Zeon: Peter, take out Bowie's jewels!

Bowie: Nooooo! I don't want to be castrated! **Óo****Ò**

Peter: If you don't stop being an asshole, maybe I'll do it!

Sarah: But we don't know how to take them out…

Peter: Well, we never tried. Mr. Hero here actually likes them. **¬.¬**

Bowie: So shiny…n.n

Sarah bitch-slaps him.

Peter gives him the jewel.

Zeon: I can feel it, my power…Good job bitch! Take a rest!

P. Elis: Wha?

A dark cloud envelopes the princess

Zeon: And you too Lemon!

He takes out a flame and farted directly to lemon. He started to burn.

Lemon: AIEEE!

Zeon: That's my special fire. Will kill any bitch!

Bitch Force: Ewww…

* * *

Elric: And now, what do we do? 

Janet: I don't want to be burn, it surely hurts!

Elric: **¬.¬ **… Surely.

Bowie: I know! Kazin, it's a zombie!

Kazin: What? Die! BLAZE!! **TT********TT**

The jewel falls to the floor.

Bowie: I knew there was a reason for bringing him along.

Zeon stuns everyone.

Zeon: Hah! That's what you get, bitches!

With meat falling from his face Lemon approaches him in a very gore scene. After a bit of struggling they both fall in the dark dimension.

Zeon: I will return! Remember!

Peter: Whatever…

* * *

Zeon: Damn Bitch Force! 

Dark Dragon: Welcome to the club, dude!

Darksol: We have T-shirts...

* * *

Karna: The villain has been punished! 

Suddenly appearing Rick: The justice is the winner today!

Peter: EEEEK! I thought you were stunned, annoying brat!

Jaha: You think he will really return?

Slade: Maybe in "Bitch Force 5, Return of the whore, again."

Sheela: Well, free at last!

May: Yes, we can move now!

Sheela: I was referring to my engage, now that Lemon is gone. Did you see his zombie face? Ewww…

Taya: Whore!

Bowie: Aw… My poor clay arm was broken in the fight…

Peter: Who cares? It was surely useless anyway…

Astral: I forgot about the Princess!

Chester: Poor old man. He's so forgettable…

Peter looks at Elis: She seems to be dead.

Everyone: Yippy! n.n

Sir Astral: She's not dead... **¬.¬**

Everyone: Aw... **TT-TT**

Sir Astral: But she's so hot, I mean, cold in her head, let me check her under her clothes…

Sarah bitch-kicks him in the groin.

* * *

Mitula appears. 

Mitula: Well done, Bitch Force! We've been watching you all this time. It was quite entertaining until we run out of popcorn.

Peter: … You said "WE"?

Bowie: The same "WE" Sir Astral uses?

Mitula: I'm talking about Volcanon.

Bowie: WTF? And you didn't do anything?

Mitula: Haven't I already said that we've been just watching? Your ears don't work or something? Well, thanks for weakening him. Now I'll seal him. Give me your jewels!

Bowie: My jewels are all yours… "drools"

Sarah bitch-slaps him.

Mitla: You must go now.

Astral: Wait; tell us how we awaken Elis, please!

B. Force: We don't care!

Mitula: You wanna know?

B. Force: NOOO!!!

Mitula: Ok! She is on a demonic lust. That's why she's cold. When she recovers his temperature, his true slave must spank and screw her senseless. Bye!

Astral: And when she will recover her temperature?

Mitula: Who do you think I am? Dr Quinn? I don't know… Maybe next year. Farewell!

Everything trembles.

Jaha: An earthquake!

Luke: No, moron! She's sealing the tower!

Astral: Let's get out! Bowie, you carry the princess!

Bowie: Lazy bastard!

They run until they remember Bowie's Egress spell and get out of there.

* * *

2 years later Granseal is totally reconstructed (And don't ask about the great chasm that destroyed it before) and they reunited in the castle at Sir astral's order. 

Astral: Listen up, bitches! The princess has finally recovered her temperature.

Peter: So?

Sarah: That's all?

Slade: You told us you have good news!

Astral: …**¬.¬** Riiiiight! So, we're going to follow Mitula's advice and choose her slave.

Peter: We don't need to choose. Is Bowie! Don't you agree, Luke?

Luke: Sure!

Bowie: WTF??? **o.O**

Astral: All of you agree?

Bowie: NO!

They ignore him.

Jaha: But, I love her! May I spank her? Please…

Bowie: Sure!

Slade: I'm afraid you're too ugly to be a king. Not as ugly as Randolf, but…

Randolf: Hey!

Bowie: You're not helping, damn rat!

May: Bowie is a human; they'll make a cute couple!

Bowie: Who asked you, bitch? Besides, Chaz is also a human.

Higgings: Bowie is a good bitch with the manners of a knight. The best choice.

Bowie. Weren't you dead?

Astral: Nobody disagrees?

Bowie: I do!

Astral: Nobody?

Bowie: Helloooo?

Astral: Sarah, What do you think?

Sarah: #$&!!!!!

She goes away crying and bitch-slapping everything at range..

Bowie: _Well, at least I'll be free of all that bitch-slapping…_

Chester: Did she want a spank from Bowie? With that bitchy attitude I didn't know it!

Kazin: I'll go and comfort her! (now she is the emo…)

Chester: I'm going too!

Kazin: Sorry, I don't do "ménage à trois"

He goes after her.

Chester: What does he mean? I don't understand!

May: Because you're a moron!

Rohde: That reminds me of when I was young…

Zynk: In prehistoric times?

Rohde bitch-slaps him.

Luke: You see, Astral? We all agree. But you knew we'll do it, didn't you?

Astral: You know, Luke? You're a bitch. But I didn't know about Sarah and Jaha…. Well, I did, but I'm such a bastard! Bowie, I choose you!

Bowie: I'm not a pokemon…

Kiwi: I'm not either!

Everyone: He talks!!!!

Kiwi: Well, you never asked me after promotion…

King Granseal: Bowie, go and spank her awake!

He goes.

* * *

In his way he meets the minister. 

Minister: Oh, Bowie, after this you'll get married. I'll be happy to service you as I served the King. "winks"

Bowie: …¬-¬ gets a step away from him

Minister: Bowie, please. Spank her good!

* * *

He arrives to the princess dungeon- I mean, room. 

**The princess is asleep. Will you spank her? Yes/No**

Bowie: NO.

**Ok, let me try again…**

**The princess is asleep. Will you spank her? Yes/No, I spank you instead**

Bowie: YES!!!

END. (Sorry for ending it here, but I'm tired of so much bitch-slapping)


End file.
